SNOW STICK! RD fumes after freshmen build ‘phallic symbol’ — and litter dorm with alcohol

Oh, freshmen.

Robert Alicea, resident director of Martyrs’ Court LaLande and Goupil, scolded residents in a merciless email Sunday night for using this weekend’s snowfall to craft an “immature phallic symbol” on a nearby lawn — and for not recycling their beer cans.

“There were students who banded together to enjoy themselves on our lawn — but instead of building a testament of adoration, an immature phallic symbol was created on our lawn,” Alicea said in the message, which was obtained by Fordham Daily.

“This is an official telling [you] that I do not expect to see any more of these designs out on our lawn,” he added.

The snow stick has since been dismantled. Students blamed Public Safety on social media for the creation’s demise, but officials have since told Fordham Daily that they were unaware of its existence. 

“I checked with my staff who were on duty, and they claim no knowledge about this,” said John Carroll, director of Public Safety.

Alicea also lashed out at students for littering the dorm with beer.

“For the first weekend back in the hall, there were an abundant amount of cans, bottles and more strewn throughout the hall trash rooms,” he said. “There should be no reason that there was so much alcohol found in our home.”

After explaining that underage drinking is not only against Fordham policy, but is also illegal in New York, Alicea added: “These items should have at least been placed in the recycling bins.”